Thcriptures

Dear Austin,

Tonight you read "thcriptures" with us for the first time.  What a joy!  We read D&C 36.  It was just you and Magdalene and Josten and I.  Magdalene wanted to read, but the decided not to, and while she was being wishy-washy, you started reading, which caused her to pitch a fit.  Despite that, how beautiful, to hear your little kindergartener voice reading scriptures, as if you'd been reading them all your life!  Where did you learn to read like that?  I never heard you read your school books quite so well.  What a tender gift, to hear your new-found knowledge being applied to the words of our Lord.  From the mouth of babes.

~Mom<3

Hysterical

Dear Austin,

I found this so funny - had to share with you.  I'm sure you'll love it, when you're old enough to understand it yourself!

http://motabenquirer.blogspot.com/2013/08/completely-exhausted-new-parents-sleep.html

Read it.

Love you!
~Mom<3

Emotionally Invested

Dear Austin, 

You know what it's like to be emotionally invested, don't you?  You're so young, but you love a game for Pappy and WaWa's iPad, called Minecraft.  You love to play when  you wake up, when you're in the car, in church, wherever.  I almost have to pick a fight to get you off of it.  We could say that you're addicted, but I also think there's an emotional investment.  You really like playing it, building things on it, and creating.  

I'd have to say that mommy's emotionally invested too.  I've been learning so many wonderful new things the last few years that it's changed me.  People might wonder if I'm still "on track" on where I should be, but I have to wonder where that "track" was leading me.  Quite frankly, it was a track of stagnation, although I really didn't have a clue as to how stagnant I had become.  I have been inspired to reach into the mysteries that Alma teaches us to to dig into.  

9 And now Alma began to expound these things unto him, saying: It is given unto many to know the mysteries of God; nevertheless they are laid under a strict command that they shall not impart only according to the portion of his word which he doth grant unto the children of men, according to the heed and diligence which they give unto him.

10 And therefore, he that will harden his heart, the same receiveth the lesser portion of the word; and he that will not harden his heart, to him is given the greater portion of the word, until it is given unto him to know the mysteries of God until he know them in full.

11 And they that will harden their hearts, to them is given the lesser portion of the word until they know nothing concerning his mysteries; and then they are taken captive by the devil, and led by his will down to destruction. Now this is what is meant by the chains of hell.  (Alma 12:9-11)

I was led to explore mysteries.  I'm not sure why God saw fit to inspire me in this direction, but I seemed to be instilled with a curiosity on things that were considered "mysterious", and began to actually find answers.  One of the sources was Denver Snuffer's books.

Every time I would explore downloading some of the writings of Parley P. Pratt from Amazon, they would recommend this one book by Denver Snuffer.  I found it curious that he used a line we hear in the temple on the cover.  Did that mean he exposed things that shouldn't be exposed?  I was very hesitant.  But when a soon-to-be dear friend said that he had read it, and highly recommended it, I trusted it was safe to explore.

It's been about 2 years since I discovered The Second Comforter: Conversing with the Lord through the Veil.  It took me 2 months to read it, which is slower than I've read and finished most other books I had been reading at the time.  (I would peel through LDS romance novels every two-three days or so, so this was a drastic change for me at that time in my life.)  I share it with most of my friends.  It changed my life; how?

It inspired me by asking questions.  Why this?  Why that?  Why do I do what I do?  Do I do what I do because it's supposed to be that way?  Am I truly doing things the way God wants them done, or the way man requires?  Why do certain things not make sense in the scriptures?

For the first time ever, some things began to make sense, not because the words were changed, but because my rosey glass were unfogged a little, and I can see more clearly.  And even though we walk in the smog of this world, things are getting clearer. 

This morning I read something from one of Denver's more recent books, Remembering the Covenant, Vol. 2.  This can also be found online, but I bought the book so I could underline things I liked more readily.

Having the Gospel understood is the first step, of course. As a group, there is such a poor command of the scriptures that we have some considerable study before us. Passing familiarity with some scriptures is not of much use. They are the standard given to us to help reveal the basis for becoming a covenant people.  (source here)

Ouch!  Did we just get spanked?  I think we've gotten spanked in the scriptures too (D.&C. 84), when the Lord places a condemnation on us for not using the Book of Mormon like we ought.  (We treat it "lightly".)  But we got another one from Ezra Taft Benson back in the 80's, and I'm really not convinced we've changed much since then.  Do we study our scriptures any more than we did then?  How about in Church?  We're not even supposed to crack our scriptures in sacrament meeting anymore.  Wha-what???

So I've been moved by his words - meaning Denver's reiteration of the Lord's in scripture.  They've moved me to improve my studies, my searching, my studying.  I have found a ridiculous wealth of information that the LDS Church has published for our behalf, whether it be through BYU, the Joseph Smith Papers websites, or other sites.  Finding this wealth that goes completely unnoticed in preference for articles written by the "Church Magazines Department" just astounds me.  I've come to learn, Austin, that I am at the point of relying on outside studies for my growth, if I don't want to stagnate.  And if I stagnate, I harden.  And if I harden, I am led captive by the devil.  Hail no!

That said, I am not afraid of reading things online.  My faith is firm such that I'm not bothered to be troubled by people nit pick over the veracity of the Book of Mormon.  I already know it's true, so I'm more inclined to feel sad that they're bible bashing over the possibility of more scripture.  I'd rather dig into varying thoughts among those who also believe it to be true, and there are so many possibilities!

The last paragraph I read this morning in Remembering the Covenant, Vol. 2 really moved me as well.  Here 'tis:

There is no one else who you need to look to other than the Lord. There is enough revealed in the Book of Mormon to tell you what you must do to become part of His people. You don't need me, or a program, or a leader, other than Christ. He has offered the opportunity for each of us to become part of His people.  (source here again)

Lest some take this the wrong way, let me warn that if this offends, it is indicative of being led captive by the devil.  The Lord does not command us to follow a man, despite primary songs that tell us to.  The Lord tells us to "come follow me"; it is not "come follow a man who follows me, and then you are guaranteed to never be led astray".  This sounds an awful lot like another plan, which allows for control, dominion, and chains.  God will stretch us.  He will lead us sometimes in ways, like Abraham, that we might think are not always what is expected.  But take confidence that when you know you are being taught of God, you are being taught of God. 

Two days ago Brother Snuffer experienced a disciplinary council, which is the MOST BIZARRE THOUGHT to me.  Continuously in his books, he stresses the need to continue forth in this church, despite the evidence that we have been led to various traditions that might not be the Lord's way.  He tells us that we are to come to God, face to face, and we are to continue in this work.  He makes no profit from his books; they all get donated to various funds, some of which are the Church's.

I find myself strangely emotionally invested.

I wonder: was Abinadi considered one in opposition to the "church"?
Was Lehi considered one in opposition to the "church"?
Was Ether considered one in opposition to the "church"?
How about Jeremiah?
And Isaiah?
And Malachi?
And Ezekiel?
And Peter?
And Paul?
And John?

Which leads me to the next trail of thoughts:

Is the canon closed?
Does God only allow men in positions of leadership to speak on His behalf?
If John the Beloved appeared to you, would you be allowed to share such an experience?
Would you believe someone if they told you he had appeared to him?
Is it possible that Denver has invited people closer to Christ than they have otherwise been?

I haven't read  Passing the Heavenly Gift yet, which is the book which has apparently led to the disciplinary council.  I have it on my bookshelf, in line to be read after Remembering the Covenant, Vol. 3.  I might just skip that one so I can see what all the hubbub's about.  But I have found nothing thus far which would lead me to think he has need to be excommunicated.  On the contrary, I see some of the heathenous things that come out of our mouths, and wonder at the irony of the whole situation.  It is ridiculous.

Whatever happens, he needs no defense, and this is not my effort to defend.  But I find myself strangely, ridiculously, emotionally invested in him, his family, and whatever comes of this.  I am ridiculously grateful to have been pulled to stumble across the books which have come from his "desk".

Somehow it feels like a stoning.  We ought to take care with paying attention to our reactions.

Read these books sweetheart.  You will be enlightened if you read with an open heart.

Love you,
~Mom<3

Alma to Helaman - Psst... by the way

Dear Austin, 

Yesterday I was reading a few of the words of Alma.  I do believe he's one of my favorite prophets, although I almost wonder if he called himself one.

In Alma 45:9, Alma's talking to his son, Helaman, as in the leader of the 2000 Ammonites (aka "Stripling Warriors").  He shares a prophecy with him in a very interesting way.

9 But behold, I have somewhat to prophesy unto thee; but what I prophesy unto thee ye shall not make known; yea, what I prophesy unto thee shall not be made known, even until the prophecy is fulfilled; therefore write the words which I shall say.

10 And these are the words: Behold, I perceive that this very people, the Nephites, according to the spirit of revelation which is in me, in four hundred years from the time that Jesus Christ shall manifest himself unto them, shall dwindle in unbelief.

I've read this more times than I can count.  Certain parts never struck me like they did yesterday and today.

Alma told Helaman something that no one else would know.  He prohibited it, which sharing and prohibition were likely directed by the Lord.  Why did he tell Helaman, and why could Helaman not share it?

These things were known among the prophets, but the general population would not be made aware at all.  I wonder, besides the obvious, why?  There were plenty of leaders warning the people to repent.  And every other time I've read this, I've wondered, "Well duh.  It was prophesied.  Didn't the people hear the voices of warning?  Why didn't they do something?"  But it occurred to me that maybe they didn't know this destruction was imminent at the time of 400 years post-resurrection.  While the true prophets warned, the bulk of the people likely ignored the warnings, and because of it, they ripened in pride and iniquity.

It makes me wonder what prophecies we might be not paying much attention to.  Like what about the warning and condemnation the church members as a whole received in the 1800s for not studying and using the Book of Mormon more.  Do you think we're any better?  Do we know who Aminadab is?  Or Gidgidoni or Lachoneus?  Does it matter?  We may not need to memorize stories, but we should know the words of this piece of scripture well enough that we can recall the stories of these people as well as we can recall the stories of the more commonly known people like Nephi and Lehi.  Just my opinion.

Love you!
~Mom<3   

Heavenward

Dear Josten, Magdalene, Austin and Daniel,

Today I fasted for your grandmother.  So did her ward.  She's been diagnosed with cancer, and they haven't even been able to locate where the cancer is originating.  We believe in miracles, so we fasted with hope.  The doctors just told us about 2 hours ago to prepare for her to not make it through the night.

There seems to be something going on in heaven.  A lot of very wonderful people are passing, and your grandmother Mary is indeed wonderful.  I love her as I know you do.  It makes no sense to me that someone can be fine one day, and then 2 weeks later be passing so quickly through the veil.  She has not gone yet, and somehow we still hope she will be granted a miracle.  

During our last phone call together, your grandma cried that she wasn't ready to die yet.  She wanted to see her grandkids grow up.  I hope and pray she still has that resolve, but I also know she has no fear of passing.  She has intense love of our Savior, so there is no fear for where she's headed.  

It's all just so unexpected.  

I do believe something's going on, beyond.  Maybe, since some of you are very sensitive to things going on beyond the veil – maybe she will come and clue you in, and you can clue some of the rest of us in on the action.  Hopefully it's not quite yet.    

Love you all,

~Mom<3

Alma 22 - Kingdoms

Dear Austin,

It's been a very busy week, and I anticipate that the next few weeks will also be busy.  I wanted to share with you something that's been on my mind though, so you may have to dig a little to get more out of this post.

We were reading Alma 22 together this week, and the idea of "kingdoms" came to my mind.  There's been much talk in the political realm, about how our current president is imitating some of the actions of a typical monarch.  In Alma 22, we learn about a king of the Lamanites, and how in previous chapters he commanded his son to kill Ammon.  Due to what happened there, this king had a change of heart, such that he invited Ammon and his brothers to come teach him.

It ended up that Aaron, Omner, and Himni went to teach him, and some very wonderful things happened.  The king wound up having some marvelous manifestations, although his body appeared "dead" to those witnessing what was going on.  I imagine that this is typical to some of these experiences, where the spirit witnesses something and the body rests.

This king had just been taught the whole of the gospel by Aaron and his brothers.  He heard about the foundations of the world, Adam and Eve, and likely learned of many prophecies that would follow his time.  And then he prostrated himself upon the earth, begging the Lord to manifest Himself to him, so he could "know Him".

Austin, try this.  Do you not want to "know Him" too?  I think we all should try this.

I'm also pondering the idea of kingdoms.  Maybe you can help me out on this one?

Love you.
~Mom<3

Images of Christ

Dear Austin,

You probably won't read this for many years, but when you do, I hope it helps you in some way.  Today I was in Magdalene's class, and the other teacher gave a great year-end wrap up of lessons taught.  Most of the lessons were taught before I got called as a co-teacher.  She did an excellent job, and brought a great love to the class.  Your teacher carries the same love for you, and always tell me what a "sweet little boy" you are, and how she just loves you and your cute little cheeks.  But imagine that being said with a thick southern accent.  That's how your teacher tells us she loves your sweet guts. haha!

In Magdalene's class, there was something I wanted to share with you.  Actually from the whole of Primary.  During song time, the sister leading the music showed a picture that was meant to be baby Jesus.  I kind of laughed, because it's clearly a photo, and from what I can tell, there were no cameras in Jesus' day, but the sweet sister cooed at cute baby Jesus, and lots of the kids did too.  Kinda fun.  Anyways, I went to Maggie's class and we saw more "pictures", which were more in the form of paintings.  And guess what.  ALL of the pictures of Jesus were pretty much the same.  The same face, same beard, same body, same hair color... same Jesus!  Oddly enough, while I know it's a painting of Jesus, he didn't look familiar to me.

There's a book I was reading a few weeks ago called Nephi's Isaiah (written by a man named Denver Snuffer).  I hope you read it when you're older.  In it, the author spends some time writing about how Jesus is often referred to by many names, one being the Lamb of God.  This was a really neat section, because he talked about how Jesus looked young, like a "lamb".  He differentiated between a sheep and a lamb, and made the clear distinction that Christ was everything that the older, wiser people didn't expect.  He was teaching Priests in the temple when he was twelve years old.  Did they want to hear someone preaching to them, expounding what only the Scribes should have known (Scribes were the guys who kept the records)?  At this time, Jesus was only barely older than Josten is now.  I think they probably didn't like that.

To continue that idea, Jesus didn't look the part, and didn't always act the part.  He hung out with harlots, thieves, poor people, lepers... you name it.  Perhaps if He came to America, He might hang out with people with tattoos, prostitutes, drug addicts, homeless people.  People who clearly needed help and love.  But when he was mortal, Jesus didn't please the elites or the rich, despite being much wiser than they were.

As I thought about that in these paintings, it doubly made me think, and wonder why Jesus didn't look familiar to me, even though I've seen these pictures hundreds of times.  In these paintings, it looks like the same person was used to represent Christ, but he looks old.  Does Jesus really look that old?  He looks at least 40-something, nearing 50-something.  Not that that's old, but it's certainly not early 30s, which is when his ministry took place.  That's younger than me, and you should know, I look young.  In fact, Jesus is said to have been killed about 33 years old.  That's a year younger than me now.  I bet you won't even remember me looking this young, by the time you read this!  In any event, personally, I know that more respect is generally given to someone who looks older, even if they're not older.

For example, Daddy and I are near the same age, but Daddy will get treated more like an adult at times than I do.  Why?  I suspect at times it's because I'm short, and I look young.  I look like a kid.  Perhaps more like a sheep than a lamb, despite having four children.  At times the lack of respect is obvious.

This makes me wonder, if Snuffer's descriptions are correct, was the lack of respect given to Christ added upon by the fact that he looked young?  I don't know.  Just something for you to think about.

The reason I'm writing this to you is that you have a sensitive spirit, and I expect that as you grow,  you will always have a close relationship with the Savior, no matter what happens in your life.  Despite seeing these pictures, I hope you will envision your own picture of Jesus, and I hope his face is more familiar to you than this man, who appears to be much older than a "lamb".  He appears more like a "sheep".

Another part of the sister's lesson was spent a bit on this, and how Jesus was crucified.  She explained that of all the ways to die, crucifixion is one of the most painful.  Jesus not only suffered for our sins in Gethsemane, but also severely on the cross.  For hours, from what we are told in the scriptures.  Can you imagine?  I remember feeling the most severe pain in my life that came and went for a few hours, but it wasn't constant like this must have been.  Excruciating.

Following this picture, the sister showed this one.

She asked why Jesus kept the marks on his hands and feet and side.  She answered that they were scars that Jesus would be "proud" of, so he could always remember what he had done for us.  That made me raise an eyebrow, and wonder if I agreed.  (I always keep an ear our for the word "proud".  Maybe "honored" might be a better word?)  I always understood that these marks were for us to recognize Him.  This made me wonder how much of our scars will be taken away.  Some of them are meant for us to remember what we have learned.  This is true on not only physical, but also emotional and spiritual levels.

Lastly, this picture was shown.  (I was really enthralled by her storytelling, probably more so than the rest of the class.  It was as if I'd never heard these stories before.  She did a really good job.)  She said that when Jesus comes again, it won't be quietly, in a stable when he first came.  She said that the angels said when he comes again, it will be coming down from the heavens, as he had ascended, and will be done in great glory, as this picture depicts.  What a wonderful thought.

It made me wonder if it would be while I'm yet alive.  I always thought, as a teenager, that He would come by the time I was the age I am now.  And here I am, the world is changing rapidly, but He still has not come. There are many more signs and prophecies that need to be fulfilled, but I still look forward to that day with hope, whether or not it is in my lifetime.

I hope that if it's during your lifetime, you're prepared.  There's a lot to experience before that happens, and I hope that we do everything we can to help you do whatever your mission is in life.  We love you lots.

~Mom <3

p.s. - all these photos are by Harry Anderson, and while I copied them from various sites, I believe the LDS Church holds the rights to their use.  xo